Christian Heilmann

Five reasons your visitors don’t return to your web product *

Friday, May 31st, 2013 at 10:05 pm

  • They decided they actually really hate you and everything you stand for
  • They’ve been abducted by aliens and are busy being probed
  • They watched too much Fox News and now receded to the cold war bunker eating tinned apricots until it is safe to come out again
  • They never existed, you are actually in a secret government facility strapped to a chair and they keep injecting you with neurochemicals telling you that you are a web designer
  • They are but they are wearing false noses, teeth and hairpieces to disguise themselves and really mess with you

dumb is good slogan proposal from brave new world

* Hey, I never claimed they are good reasons. I just wanted to do one of those incredibly successful blog posts with a catchy title that get tweeted around a lot.

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Check out the Dev Digest Newsletter I write every week for WeAreDevelopers. Latest issues:

160: Graphs and RAGs explained and VS Code extension hacks Graphs and RAG explained, how AI is reshaping UI and work, how to efficiently use Cursor, VS Code extensions security issues.
159: AI pipelines, 10x faster TypeScript, How to interview How to use LLMs to help you write code and how much electricity does that use? Is your API secure? 10x faster TypeScript thanks to Go!
158: 🕹️ Super Mario AI 🔑 API keys in LLMs 🤙🏾 Vibe Coding Why is AI playing Super Mario? How is hallucinating the least of our worries and what are rules for developing Safety Critical Code?
157: CUDA in Python, Gemini Code Assist and back-dooring LLMs We met with a CUDA expert from NVIDIA about the future of hardware, we look at how AI fails and how to play pong on 140 browser tabs.
156: Enterprise dead, all about Bluesky and React moves on! Learn about Bluesky as a platform, how to build a React App and how to speed up SQL. And play an impossible game in the browser.

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