Christian Heilmann

Five reasons your visitors don’t return to your web product *

Friday, May 31st, 2013 at 10:05 pm

  • They decided they actually really hate you and everything you stand for
  • They’ve been abducted by aliens and are busy being probed
  • They watched too much Fox News and now receded to the cold war bunker eating tinned apricots until it is safe to come out again
  • They never existed, you are actually in a secret government facility strapped to a chair and they keep injecting you with neurochemicals telling you that you are a web designer
  • They are but they are wearing false noses, teeth and hairpieces to disguise themselves and really mess with you

dumb is good slogan proposal from brave new world

* Hey, I never claimed they are good reasons. I just wanted to do one of those incredibly successful blog posts with a catchy title that get tweeted around a lot.

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